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TALKTOPIA - Post-Game Adventures!

here's a good place for FRIENDLY, ENJOYABLE, and otherwise very GENERAL discussion!
Whimsical Calamari
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Re: TALKTOPIA - An Island-less RPG (sign-ups welcome!)

Postby Whimsical Calamari » 2 years ago

YelseyKing wrote: So... am I missing something here? When did BK turn into a leprechaun?
vampire fashion is inscrutable to mere mortals
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HatKid
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Re: TALKTOPIA - An Island-less RPG (sign-ups welcome!)

Postby HatKid » 2 years ago

oops I turned into a vampire somehow.
every leprechaun is avmpire and or batman confirmed
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bkamakaze
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Re: TALKTOPIA - An Island-less RPG (sign-ups welcome!)

Postby bkamakaze » 2 years ago

EPISODE NINETY-SIX


a very shitty year
potentially the worst
i hear some kind of dork was born then

also i forgot to include the picture of bk getting the leprechaun outfit
sorry! D:

Back into the Freezer!
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with the facility in nimbus taken care of, we're in need of a new quest!

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robots that move?!
IMPOSSIBLE
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forshadowing miitopia 2 where bean is the villain
making facebots

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i forgot to talk to hatkid after we finished his quest, so here's what he has to say
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bk just nodding like 'yeah now i know'

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last and potentially least, we have coryman
who has been standing here waiting for like a month

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ugh i mean... i GUESS i'll help
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where at least we know where he's ghontu

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welp, im pretty sure we've returned to every location with sidequests now

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karatekid exists, screaming into a blizzard for all eternity

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this event's really short, so i dont need a new section

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hmm... where have we seen this before...?

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oh right its the part where everyone dies forever
what a shame, we nearly got the door open and everything
i guess we'll ju- no im not doing this joke again

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mikko stayed with bk because he recognised the clover on his hat
he thought it was a family member

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guess what gimmick we're re-using for this dungeon?
if you guessed 'getting punched in the stomach in real life by stone cold steve austin' you might wanna see a doctor

so uh
the old dice rolling website that i used to use? it's busted
got destroyed with the cave-in
so from here on im gonna use a slightly different one

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party A has bk, yelsey, ivy, calamari and mikkofier
which means my dice rolls will be:
1. yelsey
2. ivy
3. calamari
4. mikkofier

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with the reign of vampire bk done, we're back to two rolls an inn
Chillin' All Day!
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welp, let's move on
everyone else may be dead, but that doesnt mean we have to be

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i do like the aesthetic of ice caves
they're all shiny and spooky

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and theyre also full of penguins apparently

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punting penguins is the national sport of miitopia

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mikko levels up, and learns how to participate in protests

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isnt there a movie called 'the snowman' out at the moment
that has like, the most terrible looking ads ever

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*various police siren noises*
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never mind it doesn't count as crime if you're really bad at it

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the bigger the clover, the bigger the luck
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and pow, the power of spring defeats the powers of winter

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what asshole went and ate almost an entire cake
and left one slice

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which is more evil, a demon or a vampire?

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wait an event space already?

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...so we were split up for ONE LEVEL?!
THE HELL WAS THE POINT OF THIS
Second Banana!
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i know i do this joke every time but i just find the spongebob announcer's voice hilarious

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science is all about moving forward, after all

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first thing they do when back in the inn, after just having a near-death experience
is exchange gifts
maybe all this snow has them in the christmas spirit
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heck yeah
soap
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please enjl we're worried about you

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rocky hasnt bathed in weeks and REALLY needed that soap

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the b-team's lineup is:
1. kapus
2. enjl
3. rocky
4. lat
5. sturg

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let's get this show on the road, even if it's missing the star~

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okay, time for the b-team's level

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dammit
of COURSE it's one of these

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where do you hide the microphone

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i mean, all weapons technically get damaged when you use them
thats just how it works

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rocky bought it off a shopping channel that promised that
they also promised it would 'increase your manhood', whatever that means

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yep, its as i feared
its another 'long drawn out million paths level'

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peeeeeeenguins

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sturg has no time to be dealing with these PEONS

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apparently being called 'peons' is the codeword to summon more penguins

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protip: submerging penguins in acid may kill the penguins

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wow what a load of CRAP

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oooh are we jammin'?
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OH WE JAMMIN'!
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OOOH YEAAAAAH
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i really dont know what this was

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it doesnt really matter what this team is, since im going straight to the meetup point

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itll be easier to clear the 'giga-space' with a whole team

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i like that we're all wearing matching outfits

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and so, back to normalcy
Clearing Your Driveway!
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thats a thing people do with snow, right?
i dunno ive never seen snow

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anyway, we've got a lot of crap to get through, so buckle in

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all this pathway had were two snowmen battles
both of which were completely unremarkable

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imagine working at a gift shop
and a balding tank barrels through your front door
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and asks to buy a butterfly
tbh this sounds like a very cute gift
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well, it was cute enough to earn him another friendship level

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ivy how did you get up here
this is the second floor
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sturg magically managing to piss people off even without being there

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great! now you can make rude gestures at people

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i apparently forgot to take a picture here, but bk swapped over to vampire
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cats and crimes against nature

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thats the top path done, now for the middle one

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starting off with some BIG PROTEIN
GOTTA BULK UP FOR THE WINTER

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back up to the previous run

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two penguin battles that went by completely uneventfully
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other than this very cute picture of bk
look how adorable he is

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look, sturg
you didnt do anything wrong again bud
i mean, you do a lot of dumb stuff
like shooting people out of and/or with you cannon
but this time it legit wasnt your fault
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this whole fight lasted like 5 minutes
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you guys really need to chill out

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sturg and kapus win an all expenses paid vacation
and by 'all expenses paid' we mean we paid a hired killer to attack them

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lets see how the acoustics are in this place...

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dooooooown we gooooooo

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lat dont do it
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isnt one big thing they tell you when you're in subzero climates
'dont fall asleep'?
oh dear
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again, guys
theyre like, four meters away
you can probably SEE THEM

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the tiniest :o
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oh its just shitty butterflies?
really?
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this was literally the only move in the battle
just: battle start, scratch, death

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welp, with the party back together, now we've gotta fight the Railway Military Police

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fortunately for us, theyre much less threatening than they are in trails of cold steel

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vampires can't eat things until they get to level 17
its the rules

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and again
this was the only move used
calamari confirmed for op

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three levels in one! we're on a roll, baby

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mikko and bk are entering a matching outfits competetion
our outfits arent great, but we're hoping we'll be lucky and win

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also, i spun the wheel three more times, getting 5500G for every spin
5500 x 3 = 16500G
plenty of dosh B)

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even with an eyeball eyepatch, they still need their glasses
its a matter of a e s t h e t i c

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even when the 'vampire bk power hour' is over, the game still REALLY wants him to be a vampire

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finally onto the bottom section

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a couple of frosty gals

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JESUS FUCKING CHRIST
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BK WHAT HAVE YOU DONE
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all of these nightmares for just 17 damage

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lets all pretend that never happened, okay?

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all these twists and turns of life and we always return to where we began

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enjl straight up punches a penguin square on the nose
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and levels up from it
its a christmas miracle

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mikko, on the other hand, has a cold
get it
a cold
because we're in a cold cave

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i wish they could've lended ME a hand with coming up with a better joke

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MORE vampire time
they may live forever, but so does their screentime

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the final path, maybe something interesting will happen??
probably not

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two snowmen battles in a row
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the only interesting thing that happened was lat gaining a level from it

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kapus learns that you CAN love a machine

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bk's ready for a whimsical dream-themed adventure

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what a creative item name
and what the heck is he trying to camouflage into

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...oh god
c...calamari...
why are you naked?
why has god forsaken us?

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well, that's that nightmare over and done with
NEXT EPISODE
We face off against the boss of the ice cavern and hopefully obtain the final gemstone!

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ASS RIGHT THERE, FREEZEHOLE!
TALKHAUS & DRAGONS CROSS
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Re: TALKTOPIA - An Island-less RPG (sign-ups welcome!)

Postby Katazuki » 2 years ago

bkamakaze wrote: Image
dammit
of COURSE it's one of these

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yep, its as i feared
its another 'long drawn out million paths level'
Every time you see a triple split in a quest, it's always the same layout.
bkamakaze wrote: TALKHAUS & DRAGONS CROSS
People know this exists? Wat.

Also the team who made is game clearly has a thing for vore.
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Wow! Mosts! ☆*。★゚*♪ヾ(☆ゝз・)ノ
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Re: TALKTOPIA - An Island-less RPG (sign-ups welcome!)

Postby Coryman » 2 years ago

Am I one of those lame-o characters that says "go do this mission for me" and then stays behind and waits?
...
Sounds about right
raocow wrote: In a world where shag carpeting wins a fight against a helicopter, we spend a lot of time reading and comparing numbers.

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bkamakaze
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Re: TALKTOPIA - An Island-less RPG (sign-ups welcome!)

Postby bkamakaze » 2 years ago

EPISODE NINETY-SEVEN


you'd think asus, the multi-billion dollar company, could afford to have more than one service station in the whole city, and at least one that's not an hour away from where i live

Frozen to the Core!
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what is it, bk? what do your pudding eyes see?

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how the heck is he gonna respond
he clearly has no face

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that's kinda our job at this point

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jesus i dont think ill ever get over that face
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fun fact: as a child i once stuck my head in the freezer and tried to eat the ice at the back
my lips and tongue were stuck on there for a good fifteen minutes before my parents got home
this fact was not very fun for young bk

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let's get our fighters in top condition, yo
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ice cubes, anyone?

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please dont make that face at me
with that tiny little mouth attached to your chin
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you cannot corrupt that which is already corrupt

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it turns out explosions are pretty effective against frozen water

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WHAT KILLED THE DINOSAURS?
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THE ICE AGE!

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with a dagger in her heart, the frozen queen falls once more
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man that sounded a lot more dramatic than it really was

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for when you wanna get frostbite in your throat

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what if one time
we beat a 'stolen face monster' and the face doesnt come off
and we're just like 'well shit'

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funny that a fire-breathing dragon gets turned into an ice monster

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you owe me a life debt now
put on this maid costume and we'll get started

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or uh, yknow, maybe the jewel we need to progress
that'd work i guess

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yeah the massive gemstone the size of my face that's probably worth a small fortune

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cha-ching! final jewel get!

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wait
its only now occurrring to me
why are the gemstones on the OUTSIDE of the castle
if mata hari really didnt want people coming in
why not keep the damn things where we can't get them

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well, regardless, that's the final quest done!

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which, again, were scattered around in random locations rather than somewhere where mata hari could guard them

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:D

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where will you be when diarrhea strikes
...i made that joke yesterday but it works here too

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sturg what are you doing

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ready to roll, baby
let's go beat up a nerd

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look you can't just paint a bat different colours and claim its a new weapon

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level 20's across the board, let's rock

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before we move on, let's check on coryman see how he's going
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'friend'
are you that ashamed to say you're dating a dragon
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and yet you didnt come help save him...
hrm...
Heaven's Door!
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with all the gemstones in hand, let's pop the locks on this stronghold!

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yes i did just explain that

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it means we're going to a pawn shop!
we're gonna be rich!

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or that
i suppose

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bk's gonna fucking murder her
there's bloodlust in those eyes

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'aw shit right i probably should kill her then'

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i mean i GUESS they're a friend

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yoooooooou betcha
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hey dont judge me
if my friend does some dumb shit
like becoming a more powerful dark overlord than i am
then im allowed to smack some sense into them
its the law

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if we dont then the game wont progress and the thread ends
people will riot outside my window
i dont need that

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determined? nah, that's the other yellow guy

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im gonna need all the luck i can get
im going to fight satan with a frying pan

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this is it, luigi

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who the heck is making all these 'gem-based' door systems

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god that looks dumb
mata hari you're bad at decor

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...can we keep the gems? like, im sure we could use miiBay or something for it...

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jeepers gang, let's unmask this spook!
Welcoming Party!
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...karatekid how did you even get in here
ill never understand the powers of a quizmaster

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covering your whole tower in stained glass wont change my mind about your decor, mata hari!

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i recognise that onion-scented laugh anywhere!

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you've been too busy sipping martinis in your big spooky tower to stop by and say hello
im hurt that you care so little ;n;

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cant you just come here and fight me so we can get this over with?
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guys you can't fight a disembodied voice
i admire your determination but come on

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it better not be a riddle or im doubling the asskicking

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oh great, a 'bosses in review' dungeon

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i cant wait to cuddle some old friends! :D

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when you do as many evil laughs as they do, you're bound to get a few

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ive got a piping hot buttkicking fresh for delivery

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if we kill eight of these and steal their orbs, do we get a wish?

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as cool as they look, they're kind of a real pushover

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also, a new item!
...i have no idea how to pronounce that

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demons have been demoted to regular enemy status

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FIGHT FIRE WITH FIRE

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again, enemies in this place arent very threatening so far
mata hari your minions are terrible! hire better ones!

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what is it with villains in rpgs and leaving stuff lying around in random chests

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the nice fresh air of a big death tower is great for colds

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all support classes, this can't POSSIBLY go badly
NEXT EPISODE
We move further forward through the Sky Scraper! Watch out, Darker Lord!

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TA-DAH! SARD BORKEN
TOWEL TALKHAUS
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Ivy
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Re: TALKTOPIA - An Island-less RPG (sign-ups welcome!)

Postby Ivy » 2 years ago

why do those mints look like Starburst. not very conducive of being Icy
Also, it had to be said: Sturg's camo suit is just a minecraft creeper
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bkamakaze
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Re: TALKTOPIA - An Island-less RPG (sign-ups welcome!)

Postby bkamakaze » 2 years ago

EPISODE NINETY-EIGHT


there was a rent inspection today
not a huge deal or anything, the house was super clean
but i was at the shops when it happened
and they locked me out
so i kinda awkwardly stood around until my roommate came home >.>
this has been storytime with bk

Nightlight Nightmare!
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there really isnt a whole lot of space between these levels, is there?

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oh hey new enemies
these look pretty neat, but i have no idea why they're here and not in the ice world

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enjl's healing rubs rocky the right way

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and then the exact same thing happens with bk and mikko
what is it with our healers today

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*various waluigi sounds*

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bk levels up, learning how to be a stinky boy

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ew salad
what is this healthy bullshit >:c

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bk will forever live with the dark consquences of this decision
...for a minute there i forgot how to spell 'decision'
i wrote it as descition for a second and had to sit there and rethink my whole life
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look im not sure why mata hari has a banana dispensary system installed in their castle but hey thats her business

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wouldnt be a miitopia dungeon without split paths

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ding~♫ free tickets, yo

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not a massive amount of money, but hey, every bit counts

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everyone is very eager to die for each other
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also when you get good enough friends with somebody, you gain the ability to read minds
professor xavier was just someone who was really good at making friends

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its matches his outfit :D
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yelsey had a bad experience with a flamenco dancer once and could never look at castanets the same way

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bk just keeps getting new weapons for the vampire class
he refuses to get new armour

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nobody tell him that's a toy

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i forgot to take a picture of bk's class change again :p

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time to go check out that other path, yo
but first, a rehash of the crystal fight

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it's nature time baby! watch out!
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basically, mikko does a little dance and inflicts anger on a party member
which let's the act twice in one turn, but i can't control them D:

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after using the forces of nature to piss off bk, mikko spreads the love to kapus

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bk lands the final blow of the fight with his curse ability!
no touchy!

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he also gets a level from that
everything's coming up kamakaze!

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alright, time for path-based business

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another new enemy, the pop!
well, its not really a new enemy, its just a recoloured pom
but hey

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just like their forest-dwelling cousins, they are completely irrelevant

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kapus gains +1 cuteness

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god those smiles are making me uncomfortable

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he's gettin' there
the damage is getting to reasonable levels

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can't hold a candle to kapus's swordplay, though

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we hit 1800 rescues, netting us a bigger sprinkle container

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calamari is allergic to being useful

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bk is ready to become an anime character

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or not, since class changing is a thing
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between ivy and sturg, it's time to bring the BOOM
Ghost of Dark Lord's Past!
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another very tightly packed level
this time with a big exclamation mark that's probably not important

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CLEARLY the exclamation mark was to warn us about this VERY important banana event
whew im glad we got through that real quick

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hrm, i dunno, but they seem like a nerd

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what's that skip? calamari fell down a well?

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oh jesus christ yeah that DOES seem like a problem
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A VERY BIG PROBLEM

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WE KICKED YOUR BUTT ONCE, raocow
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WE'LL DO IT AGAIN

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good to see the ol' yaoi hands attack is still just as striking

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little known fact: kapus sleeps with her eyes open
its because she breathes through her retina

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with that face i dont think this would be as reassuring as sturg thinks it would be
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oh well apparently ivy is okay with it
to each their own i suppose

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kapus napping violently in the background
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these sprinkle boosted attacks are gettin' real crazy

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maybe if we let him do this attack enough, the castle will fall down

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LOAD THE PUDDING CANNON
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look, with anybody else, they'd suffer from severe brain damage with this attack
bk, who doesnt have a brain, is the best option

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and so the dark wizard is burned at the stake
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that's twice you owe me your life now, mr. canadaman

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the dark powers of demon bk grow ever stronger

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you really need to get a leash or something for it

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behold
raocow in all his glory

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one thing they dont tell you about having your face stolen
is the weird fishy aftertaste you get in your mouth

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hmm... i dunnooooo... if only there was a logo two screens ago that told me who you were...

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to be fair though, bk writes his name on the back of his hand so he doesnt forget

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OH
THAT GUY

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yall can't just keep adding dark to things and make it plot relevant
this is yugioh gx all over again

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his list of crimes includes: double parking, shoplifting, loitering, being a general nuisence and that one time where the police charged him with public urination but he INSISTS that was a different dark lord

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okay okay geez
i totally believe you i promise 100%
*psst* i think this guy's lyin'

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yes, my asskickings have a 'no refunds' policy, and the delivery is on its way

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i have a salt mine that i keep all the old talkhaugotchi islanders in
you could go work there

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w-what? you?!
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*sharp inhale* its so tempting
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okay fine
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welcome aboard, mr. cow

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...wait how did someone bury something inside a big tower
inside a big tower that's built on a cloud

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what is this POCKET CHANGE
i am far to wealthy for this nonsense *wine sipping sounds*

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moooooooore relationships
moooooooore fun

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time to steal some snacks from the environmental research facility
Curtain Call!
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time to figure out what the heck karatekid is doing in the darker lords castle

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oh, surprise surprise he's here to do quizzes
WHO COULD HAVE GUESSED

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how many curtains do you think you have to buy to cover all these windows

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yknow this entire game is made a bit of a joke when you command the powers of「THE WORLD」
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he's not quite as buff and floating as he usually is
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oh hey its GENERIC AMIIBO MII
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i never changed them because i legit forgot in world one then couldnt be bothered

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okay this one i just fucked up the timing
so yall can just look at these sweet-ass curtains
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the answer, however, was mr. scorpionboy himself

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HOW DID YOU EVEN GET IN HERE
THE DOOR WAS LOCKED
WITH A COMPLICATED GEM-BASED OPENING SYSTEM
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i will discover your secrets someday, quizman
mark my words!
NEXT EPISODE
With Former Dark Lord raocow in tow, we continue up the tower!

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BUT WHO IS TO BLAME?
CRAYON TALKHAUS-CHAN
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Rockythechao
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Re: TALKTOPIA - An Island-less RPG (sign-ups welcome!)

Postby Rockythechao » 2 years ago

calling it now, karatekid is the Even Darker Lord
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𝐊𝐄𝐄𝐏 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐃𝐈𝐆𝐍𝐈𝐓𝐘

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cheez8
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Re: TALKTOPIA - An Island-less RPG (sign-ups welcome!)

Postby cheez8 » 2 years ago

bkamakaze wrote:Image
yelsey had a bad experience with a flamenco dancer once and could never look at castanets the same way
You'd think being telepathic would make you a better gift-giver than this.
Image
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I don't really get it but okay

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YelseyKing
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Re: TALKTOPIA - An Island-less RPG (sign-ups welcome!)

Postby YelseyKing » 2 years ago

bkamakaze wrote:Image
yelsey had a bad experience with a flamenco dancer once and could never look at castanets the same way
I'm mostly disappointed because I wanted something more *practical*. Like a chandelier. Or a grand piano. Come on, man!
Image
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Re: TALKTOPIA - An Island-less RPG (sign-ups welcome!)

Postby Katazuki » 2 years ago

YelseyKing wrote:
bkamakaze wrote:Image
yelsey had a bad experience with a flamenco dancer once and could never look at castanets the same way
I'm mostly disappointed because I wanted something more *practical*. Like a chandelier. Or a grand piano. Come on, man!
Or just maybe...

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Wow! Mosts! ☆*。★゚*♪ヾ(☆ゝз・)ノ
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Re: TALKTOPIA - An Island-less RPG (sign-ups welcome!)

Postby bkamakaze » 2 years ago

EPISODE NINETY-NINE


sorry about the break, i've had a busy couple of days :/
we're back in action now, though
...if my internet co-operates for five seconds, that is

Break It Up!
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hmm... an event space right before a path splitting?
i woooooonder what's going to happen

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SURPRISE EVERYBODY
A PARTY BREAK-UP!

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did you think we'd go through the final dungeon without a return of this gimmick?

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team #1 is:
1. ivy
2. rocky
3. lat
4. sturg
as well as bk and raocow

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lat reveals they stole bean's weapon from earlier, and had been hiding it until now

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ivy, ever the oppurtunist, breaks a bunch of stained glass and makes some clothes out of it

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four d4's yo, makin' it simple

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welp, time to move on, with or without the rest of the team

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all the air around lat drops about 6C at all times
they're just THAT cool

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if you weren't wearing that dumb hat, this dramatic hair flip would have more effect

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wait what
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LAT WHAT DID YOU DO

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CONFIRMED

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bk discovers things he should never have known

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YOU CANNOT RECOVER FROM THIS

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oh hey look some aliens lets focus on that and not what just happened

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raocow watches awkwardly as we murder innocent visitors from another galaxy

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ivy levels up from that, since alien murder gets him very excited

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hey! this isnt sewing supplies! what is this?!

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hey! who turned out the lights? hey! who turned out the- etc

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death by sweets, the true ending of bk

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upgraded versions of the banshee enemies! not one, but TWO boxes of brains

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IT'S TIME

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DESTROY!
THE!
WORLD!

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rocky and lat work together to clean up all the nuclear fallout from ivy's attack

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it is time for the pudding gift power hour

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bk really doesnt understand the whole 'giving someone a ring' social connotations
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all he understands is 'friends = good'

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lat, however, has been playing a lot of sonic and needs that ring to not die

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Yellow Ranger BK... Again!

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aaaand a couple more rolls for some money
4600G x 2 = 9200G

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basking in the glow of his newfound apocalypse powers, ivy takes a break and sturg moves in
Distraction Expedition!
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i know the whole 'reunite the party' schitck is important and all
but treasure, man

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oh no! it's a BUTTERFLY
MY OLD NEMESIS

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it attacks by breathing these ice shards, hitting the whole party
(its got the generic butterfly wingslap attack too, but details)

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t...thanks raocow
throwing one (1) pebble and doing one (1) damage

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lat overrides the ufo's navigation, sending it flying off to the nearest fantasy mcdonalds
why there? i dunno man, maybe they want a fantasy cheeseburger

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oh no! these guys were jealous that the other guy got directions, and have come to get some too!
...i dunno man

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STURG GOD DAMMIT
CAN YOU GO ONE EPISODE WITHOUT PISSING SOMEONE OFF

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raocow reveals his TRUE ABILITY
HIS ULTIMATE SKILL
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...bananas
he can heal people with bananas
thats it thats the skill

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lat creams the last few with their weird green cream
its not really cream but legally they can sell it as that due to a legal loophole

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double levels, baby
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and rocky learns how to make those really shitty videos where the bass is just boosted to ludicrous levels and it hurts my ears :c

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sturgs cooking a roast chicken in his barrel

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sturg you barely have any hair as it is
what are you doing

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he tore one of mikko's arms off and boiled it down, that's the secret ingredient
dont worry his arms grow back
...we hope

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he's siphoning our funds just to fuel his stupid lust for soft luscious hair

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the fanciest tank

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...
...oh

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i have no idea which face i like better these are all amazing

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even raocow is baffled by this tactical decision
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'how did these chumps even manage to beat dark lord me???'
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there's a one hidden behind those other numbers

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and rocky lands the finishing blow on his own terms, with his weapon instead of his face

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sturg learns a skill that WONT piss people off! it's a miracle!

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im gonna have to cut this one a little shorter than i'd like, my internet's not co-operating so great tonight :s
NEXT EPISODE
Treasure! Friendship! Bananas! You name it, we've got it!

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WE SAVED THE CITY!
BALLROOM E TALKHAUS
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Re: TALKTOPIA - An Island-less RPG (sign-ups welcome!)

Postby Ivy » 2 years ago

Are you planning to stop the game after this final dungeon?
3DS FC: 2793-0650-7690 | Switch: SW-2766-9108-9399 | Steam: ivysaur1996 (that ivy guy)
Many thanks to GlitchedGhost and Rockythechao for the amazing paper Demo animation!

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Re: TALKTOPIA - An Island-less RPG (sign-ups welcome!)

Postby bkamakaze » 2 years ago

Image

look at that great logo that totally wasnt done in microsoft paint
it's been 100 episodes since we started, huh?
geez
i dont have anything special for this outside of
yknow
an episode

also ivy, i dont know? it depends how much people wanna see the post-game
ending it on the ending makes sense, but there's apparently a ton of extra content after that so i dunno
whatever you guys wanna see, ill do
except nudes
not since the incident

The Deadly Sin of Greed!
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welp, where we left off the party was split in two, and we were about to bust into a treasure space

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a big load of hashtag cash money dollar sign dollar sign dollar sign

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a considerably less impressive prize of a single ticket

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an even less impressive prize: death

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yknow how i said this was 'death'? yeah i wasnt kidding
behold! the improved version of the fiends!

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im ready for you idiots this time, no 'first turn fatalities' for you

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oh, am i not even worth the instakill? is that how it is? rude
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well at least we found a use for the shield sprinkles

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...oh dear
its only now that i realise that we have a team of almost entirely magic users...
...and these things are basically immune to magic

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i'd like to point out that raocow's pebbles do more damage than ivy's high-powered mystic lightning

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thankfully for me at least, when you're coked up you cant use any magic >:3
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well, they've already proven that they have higher hp than their predecessors

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FULL POWER
CHAAAAAAAAAAARGE

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FUCK
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okay everyone party's over the main character is dead roll credits

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wait no thats the illegal number
there are kids watching

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these guys took a surprising amount of damage, to the point where i ran out of shield sprinkles and was getting kinda nervous >.>

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bk gets a super spooky trident (you cant see it very well in his pose but its rad looking trust me)

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ivy and lat work together to systematically destroy the economic structure of a diplomatic island in somewhere in the fantasy pacific ocean
aka a pretty chill weekend

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the royal military and music academy of science and other stuff
known across the world as the RMAMAOSAOS
its pronounced 're-ma-meow-sauce'
March of the Musician!
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well with that waking nightmare out of the way, let's get back to the critical path

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banshees?! in MY tower?!
...okay i checked this is not, in fact, my tower

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it's time to enter...
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the perfume department
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who doesnt love the smell of caramel?
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basically, what it did was apply the 'distracted' status effect to all of the enemies
which is kinda really, really powerful

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bk discovers, despite decades of sin and evil, that he does in fact still have a soul to be stolen

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the stage is set, the microphone is ready and all that's left is to put on a show!
it's Rocky Time, baby!
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...beautiful

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yeah i know i didnt know i had a soul either

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oh that
well i mean
it was SLIGHTLY my fault for using my god powers to assign you to that role
but yknow, details

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look man we've all been there
the whole making people suffer on a secluded island/country
its no big deal

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maybe if i hit him hard enough he'll remember everything
yelsey get my club

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yeah, yeah let's see how well that holds up in court

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including that one time he ate a kit kat really really wrong
like he just bit into the packet without opening it and kept going until he ate the whole thing
it was horrifying

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imagine someone controlling you from behind the scenes, guiding you in ways that you cannot resist
anyone who controls people like that is some kind of monster
...wait

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after raocow mopes around for like a solid 3 hours, we make it to a split path

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this march is not the most graceful movement
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do not fear! here comes pudding!
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100% in character
i have a long, storied history of falling over

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aliens and icicles!
it's like [topical movie reference of aliens in a snow environment] up in here!

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let's get STINKY up in here

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this wombo combo is turning out pretty dang strong

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lat levels up from that, learning that combining the senses of smell and hearing can kill aliens

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some more levels! :D
our bonds are our greatest strength or some other anime-ass bullshit

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a little less science, a little more magic
a little less majesty, a little more pancakes

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here comes our pals the banshee sisters
comin' atcha with their latest hit single 'Going To Be Killed By Some Adventurers Again'

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bk cooks up an entire goblin
he just sticks a live goblin that he had lying around into his frying pan and cooked it
the screams scar everybody to this day
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oh yes, and it's very very very spicy
got that ghost pepper spice
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this was mostly because i wanted to test what happens if there's less than four targets
and as i suspected, it ALWAYS makes four attacks
which is good information to have for boss fights and stuff

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the effect on mega explosion is very rad, compared to the basic explosion

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the powers of puddings grow ever stronger!

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time to right our wrongs
get it
because we're going right

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a trio of big buff demon boys

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he does the dance too
to the great despair of everyone involved

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sturg, as an elderly man, cannot comprehend these kids and their new age references

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protip: big fire monster harassing you? just set it on fire
it'll be so confused that you managed to set fire on fire that it will go home and re-evaluate their life

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it turns out that when you only have four options, you tend to get the same roll sometimes
Royal Revenge!
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theyre really spacing these levels very close together in this dungeon, huh

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the truth is here
it used to be out there but hey now its here and its sorry that it's so late

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im sure there's been some work of fiction where aliens were defeated by music

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OH SHIT
I RECOGNISE THOSE FACES ANYWHERE
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its slambo and princess :3!

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I wonder what's for DINNER?
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you're in deep shit this time, buckos

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ITS TIME FOR SOME CALLBACKS
THE BOSSES OF GREENHORNE RETURN!

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two for the price of one, baby
the golem and the general

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ivy's seen all these tricks before, and is prepared for pholtos's Right Hook of Snuggles™
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he was, however, unprepared for the Sweeping Swing of Snuggles™
...pholtos, even when attached to a big monster, is very creative with his names

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not pictured: bk being sent flying like 100m from the punch and rolling for another 50m
he weighs about as much as a small bird

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after that horrifying display of aerodynamics, ivy couldn't help but feel bad for the guy

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grandpa sturg goes on a coke-fueled rampage, blasting through the salmon golem like it was made of tissue paper

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yknow i was making a joke here and all
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but salmons face here made me laugh harder than it should have
'well i guess this is it'

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ivy's spending this whole battle smooching and making friends with everybody

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um
raocow?
you uh
do know thats not how bananas work right
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...guys i dont think that was a banana

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despite the real pholtos having surprisingly high fire resistance, general pholtos is incredibly flammable

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and so, the royal family is once again freed!

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it's good to see you guys again! :D

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also your royal roast
and your royal steaks
and your royal... you get the point

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saving people is becoming a bit of a hobby at this point

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you can say 'nerd', its their true title

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it'd be kinda dumb if it ended here
mata hari comes down and goes 'aw nuts i didnt expect you to beat those guys okay i surrender'
and the credits roll

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i am FAIRLY CERTAIN there are many many people who are more qualified than us

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pholtos please dont make that face
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o u o

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salmon did you not read the sign
it says 'no eating in the weird squiggly sub-space'
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thanks guys! we're on our way!

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well this kinda ruins the little moment we had going there but hey free tickets! :D

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rocky and ivy get closer and closer, soon they will merge together into an unholy abomination that causes God Himself to flinch away in horror
...or they'd have steak dinner or something, whichever comes first

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lat finally comes out of retirement and rejoins the party
NEXT EPISODE
Will the party continue divided? Or will we reunite? Only time will tell!

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AND SO... WE FORGET
HOW TO STEAL 55 TALKHAUS'S
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Re: TALKTOPIA - An Island-less RPG (sign-ups welcome!)

Postby Mata Hari » 2 years ago

bkamakaze wrote: a little less science, a little more magic
a little less majesty, a little more pancakes
close your mouth and open up your heart and baby satisfy me

wait

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YelseyKing
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Re: TALKTOPIA - An Island-less RPG (sign-ups welcome!)

Postby YelseyKing » 2 years ago

bkamakaze wrote: im sure there's been some work of fiction where aliens were defeated by music
Elite Beat Agents.

Yeah, great idea, aliens whose weakness is music, to attack a rhythm game.
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Ayjo and Meya are watching you. Be on your best behavior.

Moists:
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Re: TALKTOPIA - An Island-less RPG (sign-ups welcome!)

Postby pholtos » 2 years ago

ouo
Host and Organizer of the Rando Pokemon Tournaments. Completed: I, II, III, IV, V
Dealer of the Pokermon Discord Tourneys.

ImageImageImageImage
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I do LPs, check them out if you'd like.

Currently playing:
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The 500 char limit is evil. :P

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Re: TALKTOPIA - An Island-less RPG (sign-ups welcome!)

Postby TheFinalSentinel » 2 years ago

bkamakaze wrote: Image
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im sure there's been some work of fiction where aliens were defeated by music
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Image 

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Re: TALKTOPIA - An Island-less RPG (sign-ups welcome!)

Postby Bean » 2 years ago

100 updates. Amazing again, bk.

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Re: TALKTOPIA - An Island-less RPG (sign-ups welcome!)

Postby bkamakaze » 2 years ago

EPISODE ONE HUNDRED AND ONE


these episode titles are going to get really long now :p

Baton Pass!
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an event space on an intersection after we've split up? yeah i've got a feeling i know what's next

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i wonder what gaaaaaanon's up to

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oh geez i forgot about mikko's dumb outfit

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...i also forgot that calamari was naked
somethings should remain forgotten

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enjl ke-ha-ha-mo-atatata's his way through life

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the lineup of the B team:
1. yelsey
2. kapus
3. enjl
4. calamari
5. mikkofier

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FOUR DICE AT ONCE
THEY SAID IT COULDNT BE DONE
WHO'S LAUGHING NOW, DR. WEINSTEIN?!
WHO'S LAUGHING NOW

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now it's time for the ultra nerds to show us what they can do

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yelsey is a loud boy

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just imagine he's screaming every word at the top of his lungs

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enjl has a cosmic moment

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this is yelsey at his weakest
humanity is not ready for full power yelsey

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a new enemy! i dunno what the joke is in their name, but im digging the design

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and they come with a pretty rad looking move too
hrm... medusas and eye contact... where have i heard that before...
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oh right
that old chestnut

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i hope yall are ready for mikko spamming this almost every single turn

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ANGRY KITTY

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enjl is still rock solid

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i did say 'almost' every turn

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oooooooooowls
owls and snakes co-operating
what kinda disney-ass bullshit is this

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it seems bk isnt the only one who can distract a whole team
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look i think you and i have different definitions of 'keeping it together'

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'did i leave the stove on...?'

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i took the screenshot a little early, dont blame me for the shitty cat puns
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calamari grabs people by the nuts

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please dont make that face at me mikko

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oh man these prizes rock
and/or
these prizes are nuts
choose your destiny

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luigi, that wasn't a talkin' mushroom

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now calamari
i want you to pull the RIGHT lever
you hear me? pull it and stand PERFECTLY still
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okay you're doing great now dont move
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DAMMIT
YOU HAD ONE JOB
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i-i mean, well done calamari! you dodged mata hari's evil trap! how dare she set up something so diabolical and awesom- i mean evil!

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hitting 1850 rescues increases our sprinkle amount yet again

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please tell m its the gift of you putting on some clothes

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SEE
SOME PEOPLE APPRECIATE THE GIFT OF CASTANETS
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i didnt get a frame of the relationship increase but still

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the arrow of teamwork points to the healer
this is important knowledge
Quiz of Distractions!
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rather than going and working towards reuniting with the team
let's do anything but that

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look man im still mystified as to how you got in here in the first place

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i dont really have much of a choice in the matter, do i?

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alright, here we go again

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pholtos what are you doing
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"i am the mayor now :3"
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of course it's my boy meta
'diplomatically elected' mayor metasomnia

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oh geez
its always kinda off putting seeing sturg in a default outfit
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before the horrible experiments turned him into a weapon of war ala metal gear rising

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jojk had two careers: chef and royal guard
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its so nice that sasquatch people have so many oppurtunities for employment in this society

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you're damn right i did great

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yelsey, bk isnt there to listen to my dark commands
shank him
steal his hat
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or just take some tickets that works too
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HE'S GETTING AWAY
GET HIM
THE QUIZZES BELONG TO THE PEOPLE
Backup Forward!
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i kinda expected the quiz space to connect to the treasure space, but i didnt see the wall in the middle :p

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its strange not seeing bk's dumb 'saddle up' at the start of a level

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pls no bully!!
here's the upgraded hobgerblin enemy
its basically the same with more hp/attack

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hey calamari remember when you used to attack things? me neither

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the fight passed without much happening

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not much except the MIKKO LEVEL UP PARTY
HEEEEEEEECK YEEEEEEEEAH

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calamari finds a banana
EXCITING

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im pretty sure there's been like a dozen fables and shit about this kinda thing
but god dammit i want the treasure

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how they explode with light and could probably really injure somebody? yes

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shit they know about the bodies

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why does this sound like an informercial
BUY 'CHEST SNIFFER PRO' FOR SIX EASY PAYMENTS OF $99.95

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they actually smell like beef for some reason
...im beginning to suspect these things arent bananas

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the scent of capitalism weighs heavily on your soul

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its probably gonna be the plague
the gift that keeps on giving

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hey you big bully, leave those snake ladies (snadies) alone!

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vaporwave never hurt so bad

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that was the title of their 3 hour long porn movie
its banned in 30 countries

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it only took 101 episodes but we finally got to steel armour
well done fellas, we did it

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two more rolls, 5500G for each (11000G total)
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noooooo... my hubris...

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didnt get the shot until after i left the inn, but it still works

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we've got another path to do, so we're gonna have to refight these bozos

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calamari can you please fight like a normal unit

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all the single flowers ♫ (all the single flowers ♫ )

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down we go lads

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man you guys sure were an entertaining fight yes sir

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pop pop pop pop pop

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protip: stabbing bubbles is very effective

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and that, as some dude said once probably, is that
NEXT EPISODE
Treasure! ...And some other stuff too probably!

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WHAT AM I EVEN PAYING YOU FOR
TALKHAUS GIRLS: ULTRA TALKHAUS GIJINKA KEIKAKU
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Re: TALKTOPIA - An Island-less RPG (sign-ups welcome!)

Postby bkamakaze » 2 years ago

EPISODE ONE HUNDRED AND TWO


dont you love really really needing to work on something, but the entire existance of that thing scares you so badly that you can't even look at it, leaving you sitting petrified and worrying about the impending doom of a deadline that you will, inevitably, miss?

uh i mean
jokes
theyre funny things right

The Pharaoh's Gold!
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backup imagehost is goooooooo
also treasure is a thing that exists

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wooo tickets
gambling is great

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man, Auguste Rodin's 'The Thinker' looks really different in person

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only some take
but dont worry
there's take on me too

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a BUG?!
quick someone call zummorr!
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i cant believe calamari's fucking dead

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calamari got his nails done, but it still cannot fix the void in his heart

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a quick duck back into the inn for a party re-shuffle before moving on

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they're so close!
im sure if you yelled bk could probably hear you

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oh geez its cheez
our big buff genie friend from the desert

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i beat you once, i'll beat you again!

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Pharaoh Cheez The Second!
yknow, the one who tried to dismantle the entire pantheon of gods and establish a monotheistic religion

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no messin' around, let's GET IN THERE

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see? enjl's got the right idea
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you got chutzpah, kid, i'll give you that

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man i forgot how rad this effect was
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so i found out what this status actually DOES
and that's that the mii will give their healing items to the boss
i just keep putting miis in the safe zone before they can even do anything >.>

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i always forget the raw dps calamari can put out
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its nuts

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nuts enough to essentially beat the boss in TWO HITS
(there was some chip damage but still, that fight was ALL calamari)

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good to see his still got his jolly wario laugh
how ya been, cheddarboy?
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hey what can i say you have a stealable face
you should really up security around it
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hey dont curse this is a christian thread
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dont worry, i have a boot with mata hari's butt's name on it
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its not evil if the balls dont touch
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DONT TELL ME WHAT TO DO
YOU'RE NOT MY REAL DAD

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cheez forgot his wallet

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two more relationship levels, enjl and calamari do something that would make god cry and yelsey finally learns what mikko's name is
Reunion Tour!
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their team comp didnt really matter much, since we're about to meet up and reshuffle anyway

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he's more talking about the AC/DC cd he lent kapus

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b-bk you can't just BUY a dragon
thats not even- how did- what

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back to normalcy, i suppose
been a little while since we've had our old roll setup

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a new area opened up, with doors treasure and a weird guy in a hat

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how did you even get in here
i think the npcs in this world are hiding something from me

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look how happy bk is
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'yay my friend is a god :D'

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wait he's floating
guys i think he might be an actual god

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fear

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im surprised you're not dead yet! :D

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im surprised mata hari had enough money to build a tower this big
who's funding this

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nah im good
i figured we gave it a good shot, but this is about as high as i can manage

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stairs?! impossible

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yes

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i mean, that's a pretty realistic place to put your treasure
where you can guard it

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invisible paths, got it chief

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he then fell into a pit of spikes
it was pretty gruesome

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some free tickets for our troubles, how nice

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that level certainly... existed
Lever To Me!
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aight, before we go on ahead, let's see what's here

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this sounds like the start of a childrens book

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FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT

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nah man, theyre at least 50% left

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angery bois

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oh shit, BLUE snails?! regular snails i can handle but BLUE?! impossible

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and then a dork with a key and a soundcloud rapper save the day

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...they both level up from that
the bromance is real
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oh hey i was right
its following the disgaea 'spell, mega spell, giga spell'
when do we get omega and tera spells then, huh? huh nintendo?

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is it to piss six feet in the air straight up and not get wet?

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is that a euphamisim
is that what the kids are doing these days

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is it timing your breathing just right so that you can extend your arm like twice it's length?

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shit man me too
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oh nevermind

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i feel like im the one more affected by you lot buying the wrong things

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wait did you spill my milk
enjl
be honest
was it you

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he's not encouraging enjl or anything, he just saw a ghost
a spooky boy

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boooombs?!

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ive never (and probably will never) eaten snails so i dunno if a fork is the correct utensil
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man these snails are the bomb

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and down goes the other one, too easy
you'd think they'd think 'hey maybe having these enemies that kill their teammates is a bad idea??'

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all these explosions have sturg rock solid
i-i mean they make him level up

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owo

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oh huh, i guess it was a good idea coming here after all

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Yellow Ranger BK Again... Again

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this thing looks straight out of a square enix game

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swapping faith for science
what is this, a reddit thread?
NEXT EPISODE
We clear out the area, hoping to open the way forward!

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THANK
RED TALKHAUS: GEARWORLD
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Rockythechao
the figure of Kevka's bear was a sightseeing
Posts: 926
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Re: TALKTOPIA - An Island-less RPG (sign-ups welcome!)

Postby Rockythechao » 2 years ago

what
no
this is the most out-of-character my mii's ever been
spilt milk is totally worth crying over, that stuff's delicious and expensive
clearly whoever coined that phrase was not a milk addict
A2XT Episode 2's vice admiral "The Project's Not Dead Yet" person and certified Absurdly-Oblivious Fool

Useful posts, discussions & resources for SMBX and A2XT

My art & audio thread
Audiomack (new music), SoundCloud (old music)

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𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐅𝐋𝐈𝐂𝐓 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐔𝐒

- 𝐁𝐀𝐓𝐓𝐋𝐄𝐒𝐔𝐈𝐓 𝐌𝐎𝐑𝐒𝐄𝐋 -

𝐊𝐄𝐄𝐏 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐃𝐈𝐆𝐍𝐈𝐓𝐘

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bkamakaze
A million dollars isn’t cool. You know what’s cool? A basilisk.
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Re: TALKTOPIA - An Island-less RPG (sign-ups welcome!)

Postby bkamakaze » 2 years ago

EPISODE ONE HUNDRED AND THREE


that nap was a mistake

Topsy Turvy!
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nothings really upside down its just me doing the top section

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banana box do dooo dododo
banana box do dododo do

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oh cool return of the spider enemies
i like these things, look at their cute faces

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its a shame they must P E R I S H

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calamari's outfit still creeps me out endlessly
look at that body

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bk gets a very fancy and very pretty dress made of flowers
mikko is still shaken up about it

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and a fan to match! today is pudding makeover day

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[insert some joke regarding warriors, scientists, princesses and cats here]

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aight, since that was short lets throw this in there too

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kapus now falls perpetually in the endless black void forever
to be honest it could be worse
it could be new zealand

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we have like, a full team of dps characters, one less isnt gonna be that big of an impact :p
but the cuteness factor is down a solid 50%, which is a bummer

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spiders and owls working together?! what is this madness!!

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is this the equivalent of 'twerking' in the spider world

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oh no! they've got the fever!
DISCO FEVER!
IT'S INCURABLE!

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and lat, who will never truly recover from the fever, finally slays the horde of beasts

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double levels baybeeeeeeeeeeeeeee♫

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to the left to the left everybody something something left

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every scientist knows
that when you find a mystery liquid...

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...YOU CHUG THAT SHIT

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see kids? if a scientist does it, then it's okay!

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this chest opened automatically, so i didnt get a good shot D:
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HMM I WONDER WHAT THIS IS FOR
HRMMMMMMMMM

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maybe running around buck naked isnt such a good idea, huh calamari??

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look i mean, being telepathic with bk would not be a very good idea
because its just this video on loop forever

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there was no need for other words, just screaming
thats what friendship is right

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bk doesnt have muscles so yknow
take that as you will
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thankfully bk's not wearing the dress, so mikko won't be crying
...as much

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time to roll in and take out the split path
woo image host change mid-update gotta love when shit just stops working

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kapus sticks that arm trophy where the sun does not shine

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bk hits level 20, roughly bringing him up to the level of everybody else

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and awaaaaay we go~!

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hmm, i wonder what the correct solution is to this
two enemies, one on either side of a dangerous explosive...
i dunno if i can solve this one fellas

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kapus also felt the need to stab the spider too
i think it was a personal reason
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baBOOM!
we solved the bomb puzzle! :D

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hrm, i dunno if yall have noticed
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but i have a little bit of money due to the fact that nobodY WANTS ANY EQUIPMENT
GOD DAMMIT GUYS

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catboy recovers from his life threatening butt-disease

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yelsey isnt the only one who can weaponize fishies

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it's magic time, with the magic boys
Bottom Feeders!
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we've got what's probably the key to that door, but first we've got a space to do

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boooOOoooOOooOooOOOmbs?!

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look yall, its about to be that one scene from kingsman up in here
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it's backstory time! let's find out what kind of a weirdo raocow is

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it is, in fact, the dark souls of stories

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w-what

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r-raocow that's not how bananas work
does... does he not know they grow on trees?
i have so many questions

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every day, coming home smelling like bananas
hanging your banana shaped hat on your banana shaped hat rack
and laying down in your banana shaped bed

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- v - - . -

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bk dont look so condescending
you hear voices at least once an update
hell im probably a voice in your head
kiiiill them alllll~

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whats with these mysterious voices going around offering people power
why cant these voices get in touch with me in real life
do you know how expensive my power bills are?

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raocow what are you doing

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...why the hell was their a dark power being held in a box inside a banana factory
well i mean
i probably wouldnt think to look there

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oh no not cursing! corrupting poor raocow's innocent mind with foul language!

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bodies are overrated anyway
and to be honest, the dark lord couldve done better
like, yknow, anybody else

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b-bk? are you okay?

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...oh

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yeah yeah something about uh bananas? truly awful stuff

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some nerd, i dunno 'em

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oh right them
please stop summoning that face in your speeches it haunts my nightmares

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hey bk slow down there man
she's never said anything useful and she knows it

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yeah we might need more than pebbles and bananas

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hopefully we dont need to go through that whole cutscene when we come back for clearing

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Snail Pop™! the brand new drink from Eww Why Would You Co.!

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*gasp*
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i know that guy!

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seconds before rocky makes a mistake

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not pictured: rocky getting horribly electricuted

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we reach 1900 rescues, and get rewarded with sprinkles

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as it happens, electrocution is not good for the body

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the support team just came around and screamed at rocky for a while
it was a good bonding experience

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it was a bee the size of a football
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the royal bee
the beest bee

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y-yelsey? you okay?
that uh
thats something alright

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eternal nightmares forever

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this experience counts as a friendship level? really? okay i guess im not a friendship expert but that seems a little odd

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and a six seven eight!

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back to the bombzone, baby

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cats are known for being good at dealing with explosives
trust me i saw a cat once

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and now for the split path

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STURG COMMITS HIGH TREASON
OFF WITH HIS HEAD

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murder is always an option

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more tickets, which will probably be turned into money eventurally

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kapus secretly steals rocky's wallet while he sleeps

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watch in awe as we, the magic people guys, make this cat disappear!
*gun cocking sound*
NEXT EPISODE
We open a door! EXCITING

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I REFUSE
DYNAMIC TALKHAUS
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User avatar
Bean
Posts: 3056
Joined: 10 years ago
Location: In my own world

Re: TALKTOPIA - An Island-less RPG (sign-ups welcome!)

Postby Bean » 2 years ago

So he used to work in a banana factory factory factory factory, huh? Now it's all coming together.


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