Corrupt A Wish Game

[Hacchi]

Granted, but since people are taking more time to work on things, there are fewer "things" in general.

I wish I could somehow explain The Gospel of the Third Dimension to my fellow flatlanders

[Bedlam]

Granted. However, you can only express it in ancient mayan.


I wish my computer would stop having issues when I try to play video games.

[HamsterZerg]

Granted. Galamoth is still trying to steal all of your games, however.

I wish I got dead last on MaGLX3.

[Minnakht]

Granted. MaGLX3 however decides not to publish the last five levels at all because the four other ones are deemed too offensive for their quality, and offensive in general, and yours is lumped up with them. People end up thinking that the 6th to last level is the lowest ranked one; the better informed ones just consider the dropped five "a disgrace".

I wish to dream about inklings next time I go to sleep.

[HamsterZerg]

Granted. Inkling zombie apocalypse, anyone?

Wishes? Oh, I wish we knew that earlier!

[BurntTenda]

Granted, but you gain amnesia immediately afterwards.

I wish I didn't forget to save before fighting King Mammoth.

[Minnakht]

Granted. Unfortunately that area has a bug which causes warps to other rooms to not be loaded properly if you load a save made in it, so you can't go anywhere. Luckily you didn't save over your old save, so it's a wash.

I wish I had a nice dress

[Griflion]

Granted, but the size doesn't fit you.

I wish i had more wishes.

[BurntTenda]

Granted, but the wishes are even more corrupted.

I wish I had a successful business that was all like successful.

[Hacchi]

Granted, but it's successful only among rats.

I wish for something sensible.

[Bedlam]

Granted. You are now being haunted by a really scary ghost that always hovers just off the edge of your senses, but is always there watching you. The faint sight of something flickering in the corner of your eye, or in the mirror. An acrid smell of brimstone and rot, just faint enough to put you on edge. The sound of something breathing under your bed.

I wish I could get by on less sleep.

[BurntTenda]

Granted, but you now always want to sleep.

I wish the talkhaus was even radder.

[alleightbits]

Granted, but it's denounced by hipsters.
I wish I wrote a book.

[HamsterZerg]

Granted. You wrote The Hunger Games. Now the aliens frown upon you for implying that centuries of human learning were actually centuries of countless flukes.

I wish people would stop praising The Hunger Games.

[BurntTenda]

Granted, but people start praising an even bigger ripoff book series.

I wish that everyone was equal.

[Gardenolva]

Granted, but everyone is "equal" as well. Which means, we look a lot the same, and it's very creepy.

I wish presidential candidates should be more honest themselves in debates, not making more false promises.

[BurntTenda]

Granted, but they only talk honestly about their personal problems and don't talk about political stuff.

I wish that I was the king of the world and was all like the ruler of everything.

[Hacchi]

Granted, you're the king of the world, but you're also a measuring stick.

I wish my duck was a boat

[Griflion]

Granted, but it only lasts for several seconds.

I wish i had 100 coins

[HamsterZerg]

Granted. You now have a dollar's worth of pennies.

I wish Horikawa would announce MaGLX3

[No Lynch]

Granted. However, that was your only wish, and you planned to use it to make every wish you make go according to plan.

I wish for a philly cheesesteak.

[alleightbits]

Granted. You get a cow. You have to make the sandwich from it.
I wish I had some metal.

[HamsterZerg]

Here ya go.




I wish we could get a Steel-type Eeveelution.

[BurntTenda]

Granted, but the Steel-type gets horribly nerfed when it's introduced.

I wish I had a delicious cookie.

[Bedlam]

Grented. You aren't allowed to eat it.

I wish more people understood comedy.