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The Inspirational Magical Endless Storybook

Posted: 10 Jun 2019, 15:21
by ItsFuntime
Okay, I've received this box I'm carrying, and I'm not sure what's inside, but here we go...

*Starts recording* Greetings, ladies and cats, my name is Jared Funtime and welcome to my video channel. Right now, it's unboxing time, and for today's video, I received this box from a strange person. *Examines the box* It says here that it was from a guy named "Flundsy Barrigan"...strange name for someone, if you ask me. Now, I'm gonna open the box right away!

Some time later...

*Holding a pizza cutter* Okay, the tape has been cut off, *Puts the pizza cutter down* and now, let's open the flaps! *Opens the box* And hey, it looks like some kind of book! *Examines book* says on the cover "The Inspirational Magical Endless Storybook", or T.I.M.E.S. for short.
Who could the author be, anyways? Now, apart from that, let's open to the rules! *Turns a few pages*

Now, the rules are as follows:
  1. You have to start each story with "Once upon a time".
  2. The story has to be a respective number of posts long. (Wait, posts? What is this, a forum game? That's for bored people who have nothing to do or talk about.)
  3. If you want to end a story, just write "The end" at the end of your post.
  4. Remember to be creative and original, and no repeats, whatsoever.
  5. Make the story as funny as possible! This is a book made for fun!
  6. Do not forget to follow Talkhaus rules. (Okay, so this book was made for Talkhaus apparently.)
Okay, now that we're all set, it's time to get to the next page! *Turns to a blank page*'s empty. Not to worry, let me gather my friends over to help me out on authoring it. *Rings a cowbell* Now that all my friends are here, it's time to get writing!

*Takes out a pen and writes*
Chapter 1 - How It All Begins

Once upon a time, a few pigeons were playing a game of...

Re: The Inspirational Magical Endless Storybook

Posted: 10 Jun 2019, 17:01
by Sturg
...spin-the-bottle. All beady eyes were on Stacy, the immaculate, as she neatly spun a discarded, empty bottle of mustard on the blistering sidewalk. Jimmy began to sweat, just as all birds did. Would it land on him? Would he finally get the chance to fluff-it-up with Ms. Stacy? According to him, it was his dream and future that were at stake, and never had such a better opportunity unfolded than in these series of events.

The bottle finished slowly and...

(can there be a chapter title for this story?)

Re: The Inspirational Magical Endless Storybook

Posted: 10 Jun 2019, 17:12
by ItsFuntime
(Ah, not to worry, I got the chapter title settled now.)

...the shortest pigeon, who was named Barley. Never before had he landed on in the previous spin the bottle games, but as the bottle did, he went bonkers, and started fumbling around on purpose, yodeling! Poor Jimmy got sad and flew away, crying. He had the opportunity, but the bottle blew it!

Re: The Inspirational Magical Endless Storybook

Posted: 10 Jun 2019, 22:19
by Lockirby2
Over the next three years, Jimmy went on a bottle hunting crusade. He dropped bottles from the rooftops, threw them in the path of oncoming traffic, and invented an anti-bottle gun that he used to ruin the bottle drives of unsuspecting human children. But these actions did not go unnoticed by the bottle empire of New Jersey. Every bottle, young and old, learned to fear and hate Jimmy the Bottleslayer. The bottles desperately launched a counter-offensive...

Re: The Inspirational Magical Endless Storybook

Posted: 12 Jun 2019, 13:43
by HamsterZerg
...while a certain black Scottish cyclops was hunting Jimmy for his own personal reasons. For you see, during a match on pl_upward, Tavish DeGroot, better known as the Demoman, was out of ammo for his ranged weapons, so he had to defend the pit from BLU with nothing but his bottle. It was all well and good, but then Jimmy just HAD to ruin it by stealing the Demo's last remaining means of killing people. After that humiliating day, it wasn't just all those Pikmin who hated Jimmy...

Re: The Inspirational Magical Endless Storybook

Posted: 21 Jun 2019, 19:08
by ItsFuntime
...but it was a certain pigeon who used to be part of the group. His name was Rodge, and he was the tallest, with a no-nonsense attitude, and a stone-cold gaze. Rodge had always been keeping his eyes on Miss Stacy's heart, while Jimmy had been trying his best to win her over. But ever since Barley had been won over at the Spin the Bottle game, he usually hung out at a local bar with Rascal the cockroach, who had a twisted mind, but with a big heart. This wasn't his only time hanging out there. Rodge and Rascal were having shots of Jack Daniels, talking. "So, Rodge, ever heard the news about that Bottleslayer?" asked Rascal. Rodge took a sip of his shot and spoke. "Jimmy? Yes, I have..." said Rodge. "And for years, I've never liked Jimmy...but killing bottles? I've seen harder times, Rascal...I've seen harder times..."

Re: The Inspirational Magical Endless Storybook

Posted: 17 Aug 2019, 20:48
by ItsFuntime
But now I must apologize for the double post, but to continue our story, after the two R's finished a lot of shots, they decided to go to the park. Fortunately, a nice old lady was feeding robins, cardinals, and other birds. Unfortunately, Rodge never accepted food from strangers, but he and Rascal came up with a master plan to steal the food from the birds. "Now, let me tell you the game plan, L'il R..." he started.