The (Talkhaus) Price is Right Ep. 1 - Goodbye Everybody!

[spitznagl]

[Lunikyuu]

oh my gosh oh my gosh I've always wanted to be on this show! You have no idea how much this means to me! I'd just like to give a shoutout to my mom, my dad, my friends at- oh, I get your point, my bid is...

$749

[zmonbobbo]

(I don't know if it's my turn yet buuuut)

$1100!

[Wolfolotl]

(we're waiting on kuupa but I'm gonna post mine anyways? sorry for being an Impatient Egg)

I bid 580 smackers for that hot piece of Gaming Credibility as the kids say nowadays

[Kuupa]

(sorry i spent the night playing smash ;-;)

I'm gonna say 630 big ones!

[YelseyKing]

You bid out of order! That's not allowed! I oughtta wipe your bids and make you start again, cheaters!

...

But I won't. Just don't let it happen again!

The actual retail price of that game package is... $889!

Lunatic Quark, you're the winner, so get yourself up here on the stage!

Now, you won yourself quite a few games there, but think of how many more you could buy with...

*dramatic music stinger*

You're playing the Grand Game! One of my personal favorites.

But before you can have a shot at that $10,000, you gotta start alllllll the way down at $1. A little help here?

There. Now then, the object of this game is quite simple. See those lovely grocery products up there? The object of this game is to pick the ones you believe are under a certain price. And today's price to avoid is...

$4.00. But first, I'll let Ayjo tell you about those products.

Ayjo: All right, then. First, we have Munchies Corn Chips. Extreme corn flavor, extremely corny jingle, we have it all. Munchies!

Ayjo: Next, Bubble Blast Bubble Gum. It tastes exactly like bubble gum, and you can... blow bubbles with it. Or you could give it to some monkey that decided to tag along with you. Oh yeah references.

Ayjo: Then we have Gleam! Toothpaste. "Gleam!" because that's what it supposedly causes your teeth to do. It's minty fresh!

Ayjo: Oil of Old Lady Hand Lotion is the choice of old ladies trying to recapture their lost youth everywhere. Makes your skin baby smooth, according to the package. In reality, nothing can be *that* smooth, man.

Ayjo: Koffeh Coffee Filters. They keep the coffee grounds out of your coffee almost all the time! There's 50 in the package, yeah.

Ayjo: And finally, Mouser's Choice Cat Food. Despite the can, it's actually dry food, because YK's cat won't eat moist food. It's also a four-pack. Now back to you, YK.

Now then. Four of these products are below $4.00. For each one you pick, I'll tack a zero on to the end of that $1. If you get all four right, you win $10,000! However, if at any point, you were to pick a product that's *over* $4.00, the game will instantly end and you'll win only the amount of money shown. With that... pick a product you think is less than four bucks!

[Dizzybelle]

[Lunikyuu]

gimme dat gum!

[YelseyKing]

Good choice, only $1.19, *well* shy of that target price, and you're up to $10. What else do you think is under $4.00?

[Lunikyuu]

goin for the filters!

[YelseyKing]

$1.89. Another safe pick, and you're up to $100! What's next?

[Lunikyuu]

toothpaste!

[YelseyKing]

Oh no!

*losing horns*

$4.49... must've been the "family size" tube. What a ripoff.

Let's see what you should've gone with instead.

The chips and the cat food. Well, you won $100, and you'll be back to spin the big wheel later in the show. Maybe you'll make up for this loss by winning $25,000 there!

We'll be back after these messages.

[spitznagl]

toothpaste!

[Lunikyuu]

well at least I had the right idea avoiding the lotion

a-and it's not like those 2 extra 0s were worth anything anyway! I-I mean they're 0s! th-that means "nothing" right?

[YelseyKing]

After that tough loss, I think we need a winner. Ayjo, do you have a winner for me?

Ayjo: I'm thinking... Whimsical Calamari! Come on down! You're the next contestant on the Talkhaus Price is Right!

*more applause*

Welcome to the show! Now, what's our next item up for bids, my feline friend?

Ayjo: It's that old Price is Right standby which most people will have amazingly limited use for! The Tennis Machine! From... The Tennis Machine Company, it's... yeah, it's a machine that lobs tennis balls! Holds up to 50 balls which can be fired at variable speeds. Seriously, who has use for one of these things?

The usual rules apply. Whimsical Calamari bids first, followed by Kuupa, Wolfolotl, and zmonbobbo. And bid in order this time, you dirty cheaters!

[Dizzybelle]

[Whimsical Calamari]

koba it's ok if i steal your joke right

[Kuupa]

Hmm. That is a lot of balls.

Holla holla bid 645 dollah!

[Wolfolotl]

I've always desired a constant stream of balls in my life... I bid the big 0.8K

[zmonbobbo]

Classic Price is Right scumbag that I am...

$1!

[YelseyKing]

Well. That was rather quick. And in order this time. Hooray!

The actual retail price of that tennis machine is... $787!

Kuupa, you're the winner this time, so get on up here! Now follow me over to door #2, and... Let's see what we've got.

...it's Safe Crackers!

*sinister spy movie music cue*

But what's *in* that safe, you may ask?

Ayjo: It's... a trip to Japan! Yes, we're locking the arcane concept of a trip inside a safe! Isn't that awesome? You and a guest will fly round trip coach to Tokyo, Japan, where you'll spend six nights and seven days at the luxurious Hotel...Japan? Sorry, I lost my notes. Japan, land of anime, video games, and... that exhausts my knowledge of Japan right there! I need to go there someday. Also: Meetup with Horikawa Otane not guaranteed.

Ayjo: And every good vacationer needs a good camera to capture those memories. And we happen to have four of them. From PenesamiG, the leader in knockoff products since probably sometime in the 1990s, a set of four digital camera. Still, they're... decent quality. They take pictures. IN HIGH DEFINITION, MAN!

Ayjo: It's a terrific prize package worth... $8,249!

Not too shabby, huh? But for now, let's... yeah, lock that trip in the safe. I always found it silly on the actual Price is Right how they'd play Safe Crackers for trips all the time. Because you can't actually lock a trip in a safe! But I digress. This game is very simple.

All you have to do is input the correct combination on that giant novelty safe prop, and both of those prizes are yours! So what *is* the combination? As luck would have it, it's the same as the price of those cameras, and consists of a 0, a 6, and a 9. But remember, each digit is only used once.

So what do you believe the combination is?

[Kuupa]

Augh these shorter games are so stressful! Um...690!

[YelseyKing]

All right. Now turn that handle to the right! Now turn it to the left! Now pull on that handle, and...

You're a winner! Congratulations, and enjoy your Japanese vacation!

We'll be right back with our first Showcase Showdown after these important messages!

Yeah, some pricing games are shorter than others. That's just how the Price is Right *is*.


Ayjo: If you'd like tickets to the Talkhaus Price is Right, just... open the thread and read the post! Duh. You don't actually *need* a ticket. And if you want to be *on* the show, well, there's another thread for that. Stupid mandatory ticket plug segment. Cut to commercial already!

[spitznagl]