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Grievances Discussion Thread

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cats-on-ice
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Grievances Discussion Thread

Post by cats-on-ice »

Okay Darky's thread is moronic but brought some things to light. Let me state now that I, personally, have absolutely no grievances with the talkhaus community, nor it's mods and admin.
This is much like the creation of skypehaus 2.0 where I saw a need though I wasn't directly afflicted by it. Please keep this in mind.

It's come to my attention that a various number of users have voiced grievances with the community and mods among others, though these voices have been buried under jokes and subject changes. This here thread is for those with grievances to voice them seriously in a mature and serious manner, making it much easier for others to address them.

Please keep this thread civil, as any douche-bag-ery will result in a bonk on the head and public ridicule
Also refrain from labeling. For example: "Rena is a tyrant"

spoilers: she's not you damn buzzy beetles

. It's these absolute statements that make a thread into a shitstorm.
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pholtos
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Re: Grievances Discussion Thread

Post by pholtos »

This is all I will say.
I am not a fan of when things start getting out of hand.
Where people begin resorting to things like rude language, yelling, and just overall not listening to other points.
Where it basically boils down to two separate opinions never quitting and not coming to terms, dragging on an on.
Sure opinions are opinions and are a thing that exists, but if you end up not agreeing with each other, it's best for it all to just end than to cause massive grief just to try to convince the other guy that your way is the better way.

Sorry.
That's all I have to say on the matter.
Sorry.
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BeatBoxingBoo
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Re: Grievances Discussion Thread

Post by BeatBoxingBoo »

darkychao got banned for saying literally nothing

rip
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Re: Grievances Discussion Thread

Post by qazcake »

So did clem. Something strange is going on here.
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cheez8
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Re: Grievances Discussion Thread

Post by cheez8 »

Yeah, I like this thread already.

I am a pretty ardent believer in talking things out until some sort of agreement, or at least some sort of understanding and mutual respect is reached. That... that solves things, whether or not they get worse along the way, so long as people always come back to considering the other side when all is said and done. And it's way easier for people to see the other side of an argument when nothing derogatory is happening.

I've been steering clear of all the big grievance threads as of late because of two reasons. One, I'm not invested in them enough for my opinion to be informed in any capacity. Two, inevitably, half the posts will be jokes and then half the remaining posts will include personal attacks on the other party, which undermine what may otherwise be a reasonable argument or valid opinion. And it just keeps devolving into stuff that's too stressful to be worth reading.

I love you all, and I just kind of find it a shame that lots of people are building up grudges against each other.

e: So some people got banned while I was making this post, I guess. Please, people... Just... I don't know. But make good use of this thread, at least. It'll help.
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Jesuiscontent
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Re: Grievances Discussion Thread

Post by Jesuiscontent »

If doxxing attacks is "literally nothing" you've got an awakening going on. The line was crossed before but this is just unbelievable right now
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Re: Grievances Discussion Thread

Post by Wolfolotl »

I am honestly very worried about being sent threats or insults if I keep posting anywhere in the gazebo. it's probably simply my latent anxiety, but still, I do not feel very safe
I feel like there should be a visible change to the forum rules. something that makes it clear that it is not okay to harbor and express hateful opinions and that if you continue after being warned you will get banned. I don't want to feel unsafe anymore from people reserving the right to forms of speech that hurt and have been shown to hurt and continuing when asked to stop
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Re: Grievances Discussion Thread

Post by BeatBoxingBoo »

Jesuiscontent wrote:If doxxing attacks is "literally nothing" you've got an awakening going on. The line was crossed before but this is just unbelievable right now
...When did he dox anybody?
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Re: Grievances Discussion Thread

Post by cats-on-ice »

qazcake wrote:So did clem. Something strange is going on here.
BeatBoxingBoo wrote:darkychao got banned for saying literally nothing

rip
Things happened that weren't apparent on the forum.


Now back to your regularly scheduled programming
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BeatBoxingBoo
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Re: Grievances Discussion Thread

Post by BeatBoxingBoo »

Wait, Clem got banned? Literally why?
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cats-on-ice
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Re: Grievances Discussion Thread

Post by cats-on-ice »

BeatBoxingBoo wrote:Wait, Clem got banned? Literally why?
Please discuss this somewhere else
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Re: Grievances Discussion Thread

Post by BeatBoxingBoo »

Alright, genuinely tell me where and I will go there. PM an admin?
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cats-on-ice
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Re: Grievances Discussion Thread

Post by cats-on-ice »

BeatBoxingBoo wrote:Alright, genuinely tell me where and I will go there. PM an admin?
Actually I'm not sure.. I wouldn't recommend PMing an admin. Personally I'm waiting until more information surfaces..
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Re: Grievances Discussion Thread

Post by Wolfolotl »

I don't even know if I want to just leave Talkhaus and never come back post-MaGL X2. I hope by then that maybe we can patch this stuff up and get everything all okay again, but... I don't know. I'm just really doubtful because of the persistence of people who just let bigotry go on by and snap at others when they don't
I really don't want to be a part of a community where transphobia and the like are acceptable. I live through enough of that in my life, even with my family and closer friends being supportive of me. I just, well,
I want to have faith in people but I'm struggling to find a reason with the current state of things
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Re: Grievances Discussion Thread

Post by 128-Up »

I would just like to say as someone who is rather out of the loop in regards of the goings on, that I've honestly been a little worried about speaking at all on the off-chance it explodes like what I've seen here.

Granted, it is irrational of me to think that, but it's still not exactly something anyone wants to see, I'm almost certain.

Tell me when the place calms down.
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cats-on-ice
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Re: Grievances Discussion Thread

Post by cats-on-ice »

Shoot I guess I do have a grievance..

Apparently it's tyranical to be punished for being hateful and discriminatory.
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Re: Grievances Discussion Thread

Post by Ditocoaf »

cats-on-ice wrote:Shoot I guess I do have a grievance..

Apparently it's tyranical to be punished for being hateful and discriminatory.
Agreed. The moderation has been absurdly restrained compared to some of the stuff that's happened on this forum. Transphobia should not be tolerated or treated calmly and politely. People who feel like things have been dealt with too harshly either don't understand what's happened or have terrible priorities.
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Re: Grievances Discussion Thread

Post by Oddwrath »

cats-on-ice wrote: Apparently it's tyranical to be punished for being hateful and discriminatory.
Jesuiscontent wrote:doxxing
talkhaus wrote:Clam and darkychao getting banned
...Is all the drama just happening behind the backs of an average non-irc non-skypehaus talkhauser like me? Because, I saw none of that.
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cats-on-ice
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Re: Grievances Discussion Thread

Post by cats-on-ice »

Oddwrath wrote:
cats-on-ice wrote: Apparently it's tyranical to be punished for being hateful and discriminatory.
Jesuiscontent wrote:doxxing
talkhaus wrote:Clam and darkychao getting banned
...Is all the drama just happening behind the backs of an average non-irc non-skypehaus talkhauser like me? Because, I saw none of that.
Oh shoot you're kind of right.. I apologize for that. The last comment of Darky's shithread was rena saying she doesn't like to be doxxed, implying, (and later confirmed) that darky doxxed her, but that's as far as it goes for tangible forum happenings.


Edit: As for the hate punishment, that's what preluded things like aposke's and sept's bans, which (mostly in skypehaus 1 and 2) they claim to be unjustified and tyranical. This is also implied by darkychao.
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Re: Grievances Discussion Thread

Post by Wolfolotl »

Horikawa I don't think you understand that now a lotta trans people feel unsafe to even touch the forums in general. I don't think tone policing is the issue anymore
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cats-on-ice
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Re: Grievances Discussion Thread

Post by cats-on-ice »

Wolfolotl wrote:Horikawa I don't think you understand that now a lotta trans people feel unsafe to even touch the forums in general. I don't think tone policing is the issue anymore
I think it just might be that though. There's nothing that can be done about that fear, but as non-mods it's our job to report hateful behavior. There's not much more we can do other than support those who are discriminated against.
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Re: Grievances Discussion Thread

Post by sedron »

I don't like that so much animosity shows up in a lot of disagreements, and it seems like that's being kind of thrown under the rug sometimes recently because of the whole gender issue topic.

I agree that people should be able to be themselves and not have to worry about their gender identities causing them issues here. I genuinely want this to be a place for everybody. I think one of the main things we can take from the last few days, just looking at people in the Twitter thread, is that the majority of people here don't want to hurt one another and really love this community. It's sad that people were so affected by what's happened that a lot of them aren't even here right now.

That said, I keep seeing stuff like this.
Leod wrote:The solution is as simple as not denying people their identity for no reason other than "they were mean to me".
Not that there really are valid reasons.

It should be of no surprise that people will respond angrily to that, and righteously so.
Yet a lot of issues are caused by aggression aimed at people who aren't denying others their identities. I personally took a lot of crap in the original pronouns thread when I was just asking questions. I really don't mean to offend anybody and if I do that I just want to be given a calm explanation of what I did. Yeah, I'm a white, straight cisgendered male who hasn't gone through much in terms of discrimination at all. It doesn't mean I'm out to hurt anyone, and honestly the way that thread went down has kept me out of any serious discussion here for a few days. I also think GlitchedGhost's thread was made with the best intentions (and certainly no hate or discrimination in mind,) and look what happened there.

It's not a black and white "these people are wrong and these people are right," kind of thing. I think Horikawa has the right idea with how talking to other people about touchy subjects should work, so I'm not going to just go repeating all of that.
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Re: Grievances Discussion Thread

Post by Kapus »

I wish we could all get along and be friends. Wouldn't that be nice? Treating each other nicely, making peace instead of war, understanding each other instead of dismissing, helping each other instead of hurting. Being happy with each other. Wouldn't that be great? Lots of people feel anxious, unsafe and just generally sad on this board, even with the people causing such feelings being gone already.

It'd be great if we could try to fix that. It'd be great if we could hug, make peace, and make this forum friendly and welcoming to people again.

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Re: Grievances Discussion Thread

Post by Mata Hari »

Wolfolotl wrote:stuff
You apologized to me in the other thread and I'd like to apologize in return. I lost my sense of perspective, we have more in common than such disputes make it seem. So I'm hoping we can put it behind us.
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Re: Grievances Discussion Thread

Post by KobaBeach »

Kapus wrote:I wish we could all get along and be friends. Wouldn't that be nice? Treating each other nicely, making peace instead of war, understanding each other instead of dismissing, helping each other instead of hurting. Being happy with each other. Wouldn't that be great? Lots of people feel anxious, unsafe and just generally sad on this board, even with the people causing such feelings being gone already.

It'd be great if we could try to fix that. It'd be great if we could hug, make peace, and make this forum friendly and welcoming to people again.

We're all human. We're all in this world together, and in this forum together. We should help each other, not harm!
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