Wolfolotl wrote:if you're cis (not trans or nonbinary) please try to not intrude unless you have some gender feels of your own[/list]
Are you basically saying that cis people aren't allowed to post in this topic unless they start having non-cis feelings of their own? Correct me if I'm wrong. I understand you wanting to try and keep peace with such discussions, but I don't think explicitly excluding people like that is a very kind or a very helpful way to go about it. Relate, don't separate.
Anyway, a close friend of mine once told me that she rather wants to be a man, so she is going to do the... process? I don't know how to describe it properly.
I'm not really sure how to react to that. Any tips?
FluffiMasta wrote:Anyway, a close friend of mine once told me that she rather wants to be a man, so she is going to do the... process? I don't know how to describe it properly.
I'm not really sure how to react to that. Any tips?
well to start out you could not refer to 'em as she, unless said friend wants you to
@Wolfolotl That is true and fair. I just worry about one side possibly antagonizing or dismissing the other. I feel it's best that everyone should learn to accept and get along with each other instead of creating exclusion or pushing different people away.
That's just me, though. If you feel it's best to have that rule, I'm not really going to fight against it. It's your thread and all. I'm not cis myself so I don't even know if such people care about being excluded from the discussion.
As a cis person I feel left out. :(
Anyway, a close friend of mine once told me that she rather wants to be a man, so she is going to do the... process? I don't know how to describe it properly.
I'm not really sure how to react to that. Any tips?
Refer to them as the pronouns that they prefer, ask them any questions (politely of course) about it if you're curious so you can fully understand. Also, no need to feel left out or anything! We can all be friendly pals here regardless of how we identify!
this place is kinda not meant for cis people so? cis people will not be received so warmly here on principle. this is specifically a safe space for people who aren't cis, so yes, cis people are kinda not invited to the party
EDIT: it was pointed out to me that this post comes across as kinda nasty so! I just wanna say I mean no one any malice and I don't want a big argument again I just wanna mention that this thread's audience is not intended to be cis people
Last edited by Wolfolotl9 years ago, edited 1 time in total.
I was gonna say something else but I noticed that the first post and such was edited for the rules. So...okay!! Sorry for making a fuss on the first page, I just worry a lot about there being peace and acceptance.
so uhh yeah! I'm a trans person too and have been for a few years, though I had feelings about my gender since I was as little as 6 years old or so. I also have a little sister who is also transgender. Being the only two people in a (mostly) unaccepting family, we support each other a lot on the matter! We don't express our gender identity that much in public, but when we're alone, we express and discuss it to our fullest desire. We are both 10 times happier with our lives after we realized our gender feelings.
I love my sister very much and she means everything to me<3
i was avoiding clarifying that i was trans on here for a long time due to how badly everyone handles this kind of thing, but now that there is a Specific Thread for it thats intended to be good i can just say that, yep, thats the deal
although i guess i sorta implied it recently
Well it is a decent hack but sometime its just too repetitif there no level that actually pop in your face and your like oh yeah that level they all ressemble themselves and just monster along the way.
Blood Ghoul wrote:Sometimes it seems my blood spurts out in gobs, as if it were a fountain's pulsing sobs. I clearly hear it mutter as it goes yet cannot find the wound from which it flows. Before I met you, baby, I didn't know what I was missing.
Leet just tell me if there is anyone who gives you shit for being trans and I will slam dunk them into the transphobe dumpster and then offer you a snack of your choice
Ok I guess this is the place to put this. I'm typically "up" on social issues like this and all but... I dunno, I still kinda have hangups on people identifying outside of the spectrum of male and female? Like going from male to female (or the other way) yeah, good, I'm okay with,and I'm even okay with people somewhere in the middle (it took me a while but yeah) but like... I dunno. Like not trying to be disparaging. but the idea of "trying on genders" just kinda feels like... reducing the whole issue of transgenderism to people wanting to be trendy, which is damaging to the issue as a whole. Or like, identifying as "bunself" or whatever. Like seriously, could someone educate me here? I'm not trying to be offensive or anything, I seriously want to know.
Kapus wrote:I was gonna say something else but I noticed that the first post and such was edited for the rules. So...okay!! Sorry for making a fuss on the first page, I just worry a lot about there being peace and acceptance.
so uhh yeah! I'm a trans person too and have been for a few years, though I had feelings about my gender since I was as little as 6 years old or so. I also have a little sister who is also transgender. Being the only two people in a (mostly) unaccepting family, we support each other a lot on the matter! We don't express our gender identity that much in public, but when we're alone, we express and discuss it to our fullest desire. We are both 10 times happier with our lives after we realized our gender feelings.
I love my sister very much and she means everything to me<3
w-w-whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Kaaaaaaapuuuuuuuuus
I am seriously blushing up a storm right now gosh someone help ;v;
I love you so much sis thanks for all of your support over the past few months I'd never have been able to get through it all without you you mean the world and MORE to me aaaahhhhhhh<3<3<3
MoneyMan wrote:Ok I guess this is the place to put this. I'm typically "up" on social issues like this and all but... I dunno, I still kinda have hangups on people identifying outside of the spectrum of male and female? Like going from male to female (or the other way) yeah, good, I'm okay with,and I'm even okay with people somewhere in the middle (it took me a while but yeah) but like... I dunno. Like not trying to be disparaging. but the idea of "trying on genders" just kinda feels like... reducing the whole issue of transgenderism to people wanting to be trendy, which is damaging to the issue as a whole. Or like, identifying as "bunself" or whatever. Like seriously, could someone educate me here? I'm not trying to be offensive or anything, I seriously want to know.
what's wrong with gender experimentation? nothing! there is exactly zero thing wrong with trying out different ways of identifying until you find one that feels right. how that would be making it into a fashion trend, I do not know, but there's nothing wrong with pronouns and gender feels that fit best for you that aren't some concept related to the mental construct we call the gender binary
and if being trans is now trendy then hot damn am I stylin'
You know, I was just talking about this with my mom recently, who is really progressive and all around a great person, but she's been sort of struggling to wrap her mind around a lot of non-traditional gender identities and so forth. She said something like, "I totally support people being who they want to be, but doesn't it seem really confusing sometimes?"
And I had to think about it for a bit, but basically what I told her was that, yeah, it can be kind of confusing sometimes, and it can be awkward when you accidentally refer to someone using the wrong pronoun without realizing it, but in those cases you should just apologize and respect their wishes from then on. If it's a matter of someone expressing who they truly are, then a little confusion at first is a pretty small price to pay for someone's happiness.
And furthermore-
Medley wrote:
Kapus wrote:I was gonna say something else but I noticed that the first post and such was edited for the rules. So...okay!! Sorry for making a fuss on the first page, I just worry a lot about there being peace and acceptance.
so uhh yeah! I'm a trans person too and have been for a few years, though I had feelings about my gender since I was as little as 6 years old or so. I also have a little sister who is also transgender. Being the only two people in a (mostly) unaccepting family, we support each other a lot on the matter! We don't express our gender identity that much in public, but when we're alone, we express and discuss it to our fullest desire. We are both 10 times happier with our lives after we realized our gender feelings.
I love my sister very much and she means everything to me<3
w-w-whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Kaaaaaaapuuuuuuuuus
I am seriously blushing up a storm right now gosh someone help ;v;
I love you so much sis thanks for all of your support over the past few months I'd never have been able to get through it all without you you mean the world and MORE to me aaaahhhhhhh<3<3<3
GWUUUUUUH SIBLINGS TOO ADORABLE I WASN'T READY FOR THIS
I'M HAVING A HEART ATTACK FROM CUTENESS AND EMOTIONS~
so, yeah, you're the only people i feel safe saying this
soooo, thanks????
do not take the swag pronouns seriously, not even as a joke, I do not mean to offend anybody, I'm mocking those who mock non-binary issues by creating absolutely nonsenical genders
Last edited by sonicspin9 years ago, edited 2 times in total.
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sonicspin would you be more comfy if we put discussions on here on your situation in spoiler tags? you seem a bit shy about it so I wanna know what would make you the most comfortable.
and Horikawa there should be no bad gender vibes because ideally gender should be one of the most easily-embraced facets of the self
ya now, for de srs stuff
I have always been very confused about myself
I have never found a word about it, except dismissive ones
so yeah, the thing is, um
eh
i identify as a girl?? uh, this is how you say it, right??? gosh so weird right now
it's really weird, because all my family is cis and conservative and i iz scared of telling anyone, like, literally, you're the first peeps i tell you this
this is the first place i've felt safe to say this
uh, thanks?
Your gender identity is nothing wrong or anything to be ashamed of. If you feel like you'd rather be known as a girl, you have a right to identify that way! It's all up to you and nobody really has any place to tell you otherwise.
I know what it's like to grow in an unaccepting family of such ideals, but at least know that you're not in the wrong by feeling this way! I'm glad you had the confidence to speak up about it.
By all accounts, I'm male, cis. However... I'm not exactly what one would call "loyal" to my gender... or any, really. I'm... honestly rather confused about it all. I have male tendencies, but I have a lot of female ones, as well, and sometimes they're far stronger than the male ones. Very few stereotypically "male" activities and interests appeal to me at all. I'm not romantic at all, either; I don't desire sex of any kind, and just about all "love" I've felt has been platonic, and often a more "parental" variety, particularly towards kids. I used to be a little more open to the more romantic type of love when I was younger; I guess now I'd say I'm "asexual", but in my youth I suppose I'd say I was bi. Still technically am, but without any desire, it's hard to really think of myself as such... yeah. It's confusing, even to me. I've actually thought about transitioning here and there throughout my life, but I don't exactly *feel* female, either, so I don't believe it would do a whole lot in my situation. Not to belittle others, of course; I feel like such a thing is something you should be absolutely sure of with all your being, and I'm... well, I'm not, so I haven't.
Basically, I feel like I straddle the line somewhere between male and female. I identify as male, but it's more for convenience than because I care one way or another. I guess you could say I'm "gender-neutral"? That the whole concept of gender doesn't really matter a lot to me, I guess? I dunno. Again, I don't mean to put anyone down here. This is just *my* situation, and... I wanted to get this off my chest, as it's something I *very* rarely talk about, because I feel like my stance may come across as a direct attack on transgender people... which I swear, it isn't intended to be... sigh... Like I said, I'm a confused person.
Ayjo and Meya are watching you. Be on your best behavior.
Yelsey, there are many gender identities in which your gender is masculine but not like intensely so, if you are wondering if that's the case! my personal suggestions are that you check out being a demiboy, which is like kind of a guy but also kinda nonbinary or agender, or being bigender, which means that you've got two predominant gender feels for the price of one, or from what you said about feeling neither masc nor femme, maybe you wanna say you're gender neutral or just plain nonbinary! it's all up to you
in terms of "behaving in a [gender] manner", that's all basically self-determined. you find knitting fulfilling to your masculinity? then it can be a guy thing for you! with gender presentation it's all up to you
Last edited by Wolfolotl9 years ago, edited 1 time in total.
It's pretty late at night so I might be a little mellow while writing this.
I feel like writing something positive about my identity. It's kind of like a thing I've build up from the stuff I've seen/read and experimented on. Sometimes I feel a little more childish, and sometimes I like being more patient. At the best of times I feel playful and helpful to others. I feel like I'll need to adapt a lot to be able to function and sustain myself in the future. I was very unsocial as a teenager, and I've rarely been friends with anyone for too long. I still try to get along with the people I meet. I'm pretty comfortable on my current state, and I've been lucky enough to be allowed to watch soaps and knit and do whatever I felt interested in in my childhood.
I wont be writing about my sexuality here, but I feel like it's a part of my identity too.
By all accounts, I'm male, cis. However... I'm not exactly what one would call "loyal" to my gender... or any, really. I'm... honestly rather confused about it all. I have male tendencies, but I have a lot of female ones, as well, and sometimes they're far stronger than the male ones. Very few stereotypically "male" activities and interests appeal to me at all. I'm not romantic at all, either; I don't desire sex of any kind, and just about all "love" I've felt has been platonic, and often a more "parental" variety, particularly towards kids. I used to be a little more open to the more romantic type of love when I was younger; I guess now I'd say I'm "asexual", but in my youth I suppose I'd say I was bi. Still technically am, but without any desire, it's hard to really think of myself as such... yeah. It's confusing, even to me. I've actually thought about transitioning here and there throughout my life, but I don't exactly *feel* female, either, so I don't believe it would do a whole lot in my situation. Not to belittle others, of course; I feel like such a thing is something you should be absolutely sure of with all your being, and I'm... well, I'm not, so I haven't.
Basically, I feel like I straddle the line somewhere between male and female. I identify as male, but it's more for convenience than because I care one way or another. I guess you could say I'm "gender-neutral"? That the whole concept of gender doesn't really matter a lot to me, I guess? I dunno. Again, I don't mean to put anyone down here. This is just *my* situation, and... I wanted to get this off my chest, as it's something I *very* rarely talk about, because I feel like my stance may come across as a direct attack on transgender people... which I swear, it isn't intended to be... sigh... Like I said, I'm a confused person.
I was sort of hesitating from posting since I didn't really know how to describe it, and I guess I kind of felt like I needed to be sure of myself before I posted, but aside from maybe the romantic and sexual parts, this pretty much describes how I feel. I kind of only started to really think about it recently.
